I do like to be beside the seaside!

When I started this blog last Thursday, I was feeling terribly homesick, what with it being my mother's birthday, Charlene getting her results and PMS all kicking in at the same time. I didn't have much hope of having a good weekend at all, but am pleasantly surprised by how well it turned out.

On Friday night, Nicola and I went out with Ben, his Thai friend Paula and some Americans from school. Little did we know that we were going to one of Bangkok's swankier joints, and thus did not arrive financially prepared. A little awkward, to say the least. Didn't hang around long after supper, Nics and I went on a bit of a roundabout ride that ended with me at home and her heading out to party with her Mexican friend. I didn't mind, as I still didn't feel up to shenanigans and fun, so sleep was good.

Saturday morning is where it got fun. I woke up at 6-30 (which was not the fun part) and went to Victory Monument to meet Ben and more Americans for a trip to the beach. I have not been to the beach since before I left home, I cannot describe how friggin excited I was, even though the one we went to is apparently not very good. Our plan to meet up and leave at 7-30 fell through, as such plans always do. And my anal punctuality means that I, of course, had to wait for everybody else for ages. But once we got on the way, it was worth the wait.
We headed for Pattaya, which is a coastal town an hour and a half out of Bangkok. The three best things about Pattaya, in order of bestness:
3) Its smaller than Bangkok, so you don't always feel like a little guppie about to get swallowed whole by a whale.
2) You can breather through your nose there cos it doesn't have that characteristic Bangkok smell that sometimes makes you gag.
And the absolute gem of the lot (drumroll please)
1) Its by the sea!!!!!

The distance to the beach from where we stayed.



There are umbrellas and chairs all
 along the beach, Thai people hate the sun.












I didn't know I missed the ocean that much until I got closer to it and could smell it again. I will not pass judgement yet on whether Bangkok is or is not the city for me, but there are things counting against it. Like the fact that I don't consider myself a city girl, even though this is the first really large city I've lived in. Also the smell. And the guppie thing. It does have great things going for it too, I admit I love the skytrain and the fact that there are so many other guppies around me and so on. But I digress...

We arrived in Pattaya quite early, at about 10:30 and booked into a guest house on Jom Tien Road. There was a little too much discussion about rooms and who would sleep where and who'd have to share and so on, but I tried hard not to pay any attention, what with the sea waiting for me.
Straight to the beach (Jom Tien Beach) from there on, which is literally across the road from the guesthouse. The sea is quite different, as expected. There's not much in terms of waves, more swells, really. Although they do jump up and smack you in the face just as you start thinking the water's tame. The beach is quite steep too, so the water gets deep quickly. And there's these little things on the sand that I've never seen before but the Americans knew all about - sand dollars. They look like sea urchins but they're flat and not prickly. Interesting zoological discoveries. Also on that front, there are jellyfish in the water that one must watch out for. I thought it was a lie, being a generally disbelieving person, until I saw one washed up on the beach. So we waited to see if the next person that came out of the sea was scratching themselves. It happened to be an old man in a Speedo (sies man) and while he was continually adjusting himself, there were no red marks so we figured the water was safe.

Lovely times in the water, which is like a tepid bath, really. But lovely nonetheless. I tried to dry off in the sun, but its a different story over here. I was dry in approximately 10 minutes of lying out, and then started burning. Not so nice, but now I know for next time.
Then Jay (one of the American guys, lovely) wanted to start missioning and we went to the Hard Rock Hotel, one of three in Thailand. They have an amazing pool there and we wanted to swim, but the lady wouldn't let us, so we left and went to Pattaya Beach to see the sights. The first sight I saw was a fish foot spa. I'd seen them in Bangkok and had wanted to try, but this was just opening so they had special promotion prices (lol cheapo and the dweebs to the end). What happens is you put your feet into this fish tank, and the fish all swim up and nibble the dead skin off your feet. It feels so bizarre, very ticklish, but I liked it. I might even do it again!

Fishy toes

We walked along Pattaya Beach, and saw things I've never seen before. Everywhere you look you see two things: Firstly, middle-aged to old, mostly balding, mostly fat and gone to seed, white men looking like fat kids in an all-you-can-eat restaurant, and secondly, young pretty Thai girls in groups, waiting to be approached. These men have come to this country looking for a easy and cheap sex, and it definitely is easy and cheap to get. Gross.

We left the meat market and went back to Jom Tien, and stayed out on the beach till about 5, when we went off on our next mission - looking for a Thai barbecue. This is quite different to any kind of braai in that its not at all private. Its like a restaurant, where you dish up all your food, get some meat and seafood and cook it on a coal stove-thing at your table. Its all-you-can-eat for 129baht, and I tell you, we ate loads! There's all kinds of really good food, and you can prepare it the way you want it. It's generally in a parking lot, with lots of tables set out, and the food in the middle.

Thai barbecue!

Next we went adventuring to Walking Street. This is the red-light section of Pattaya, and there are many, many red lights, and people in the street advertising shows of things involving ping pong balls, candles, umbrellas and the like, that I didn't know were physically possible. We even went into a couple of places, just to see what it was like. The ladies were a lot more excited to see the boys than us girls though, not surprisingly. Poor Ben got his bum pinched at every place, though I doubt he saw it as a drawback.

Muay Thai on Walking Street, but I think they were faking it.

Having had enough of salacious entertainment, we went to a karaoke bar closer to Jom Tien and had a fantastic time with Taylor the creep, Du Hast by Rammstein and Carole King's Natural Woman.
What a great night.

I didn't last much longer after we left the karaoke bar, and we left to come back at about 10am this morning.
A good idea, even though I wanted more beach time, since I still need to move into my new room. I also now have to do more washing - I walked into my room to find that the landlord's kittens had found their way and it looks like they spent the weekend in here, nestled in my suitcase on top of my clean clothes. I am allergic to cats as well as fleas, but I suppose I had to come back down from my weekend high somehow.